Thursday, May 19, 2005

Why I hate Smallville

Here it is, in the nutshell that is the logline for yesterday's 90-minute season finale:

"A nightmare leads Clark to begin to understand why he was sent to Earth and he seeks counsel from Jor-El, who warns him that he must reunite the three crystals immediately or a disaster of epic proportions will befall the planet."

I haven't even seen the episode, but I already know it's going to suck.

If it weren't for Television Without Pity, I might despair that I'm the only Superman fan who thinks that Smallville has ripped out the heart of the DC legend, stomped on it, set it on fire, then put out the fire with hydrochloric acid. Which is to say, it stinks.

I hate shows that revolve around prophecy, especially when they make shit up in an attempt to give the illusion of purpose. One of the things I loved about the original Superman-- the real Superman, dammit-- was the fact that he was finding himself and deciding who he wanted to be of his own free will. Mark Waid's Birthright dealt with that very issue, and it didn't need to resort to lame gimmicks like prophecy or destiny.

Maybe it's because I'm an atheist, but I prefer my heroes to take responsibility for their actions. Sure, you can be tortured or affected by your past, whatever, but don't blame the invisible hand of fate when you're the one pulling the trigger.

And I can't describe how much I hate the idea that Kryptonians visited Earth long before Kal-El landed. The point, people, is that he's the last son of Krypton. Say it with me, now: Last. Son. Of. Krypton. He's a refugee, an orphan, a lost boy who finds his way because he is rescued by chance, not because it was planned for him to rule the world. He's Anne Frank, and the Kents are Miep Gies and Victor Kugler and Bep Voskuijl and Johannes Kleiman and they don't even know it.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

You suck

Anonymous said...

You suck

Anonymous said...

You suck

Anonymous said...

You suck

Anonymous said...

You suck

Anonymous said...

You suck

Anonymous said...

You suck

Anonymous said...

You suck

Anonymous said...

You suck

Anonymous said...

You suck

Anonymous said...

You suck

Seven of Eight said...

Shelly said you suck.

Aw, I'm sorry, but I couldn't resist.


Smallville has completely gone down the drain. My little brothers love it, though.

And I don't really like it. =/ I hate Lana, and her Mary-Sueness. Lana is supposed to be the one who likes Clark, and HAVE RED HAIR.

(Small fact: Annette O'Toole, person who plays Martha Kent, played Lana Lang in a movie. Incest, ew.)

I liked Chloe until the begining of the fourth season. I wish they'd just kept her dead. My favorite character has gone and jumped the shark.

Actually, the fourth season is where it really unraveled. They picked the worst possibly person to play Lois.

staticghost said...

i agree with you that smallville suck, sucks, sucked and will suck again and again. theres so many reasons why. its just a matter of keen observation of the whole series. i can name a few like how the producers are obsessed with the color green (its everywhere), lana lang was turned into a slut, the sissy portrayal of clark, lame action sequences and theres too many meteor freaks, each episode has one or two its sickening and tiring. characters like lana and lex are tossed and slam around many times im sure they could get really injured, paralized, get broken bones or just die but they just get well after the fight is over. supermans super speed looks more stupid and actual running is faster if you ask me. his super strength is not that super. its like he cant even lift a damn thing. plus when clark is in super speed mode and he pushes an enemy, the enemy is just thrown into a wall but if you think a bit that could mean that superman is supposed to be a human bullet. there are too many to mention but i'll end it here for the rest to realize that this is not an adaptation of superman. its just a trying hard copycat who ignores supermans canon.