Friday Flash Fiction: "Now and Later"

For the record: Guns don't murder people. Fucked-up assholes murder people, and they don't need guns to do it. But firearms do carry a lot of psychic freight.

Read "Now and Later" at 512 Words or Fewer

SnoutCast #149: 'Tis the Season

...for a little shameless self-promotion!

[ Download mp3 - 22 MB ]

00:59 - "wonderful"
03:15 - Adopt Lady Grey!
06:35 - Hire DeeAnn!
12:56 - speaking of consultants...
16:35 - Read Curtis's 512 Words or Fewer every Friday! (And tell other people if you like it!)
19:30 - Follow Curtis or DeeAnn on Twitter!
21:32 - (note to self: remind DeeAnn to NOT adjust her mic during recording)
22:11 - GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY
23:49 - The End

Tell us we're wrong on the Internet! E-mail podcast@snout.org or post a comment at www.snout.org/podcast.

Music: instrumentals from "Code Monkey" and "Chiron Beta Prime" by Jonathan Coulton

[ Subscribe to SnoutCast / iTunes link ]

 

Christmas Greetings

Below please find our traditional year-end family newsletter, which hopefully does not inspire in you the depths of revulsion described by Garfunkel and Oates:


http://vimeo.com/8192170

You are, of course, free to not read it. We'll never know! But seriously, somebody really needs to adopt Lady Grey.



[ Download PDF - 176 KB ]

   

Friday Flash Fiction: "Not As We Know It"

I know, nobody really expected the world to end today. But it's still fun to ridicule the concept.


http://youtu.be/fDXRCKsd9qY

Read "Not As We Know It" at 512 Words or Fewer

SnoutCast #148: Newbie Game RFP

This week, we talk to Larry Hosken and Scott Royer III about a "Newbie Game" concept which Scott helped originate and which Larry has since developed into The Octothorpean Order—and would like to finish next year, with your help!

[ Download mp3 - 26 MB ]

00:59 - "modern"
01:51 - acronym expansion (and the actual RFP doc)
02:21 - like a phoenix, rising from the DASHes
04:05 - Larry's online puzzle hunt thing (as seen on SnoutCast in 2010 and at GC Summit 2011)
05:15 - how does one teach people to solve puzzles?
08:44 - DeeAnn enjoyed the MegaHard stamps
09:14 - how Scott prepared for his first event, BANG 16
12:16 - who is the audience for the Newbie Game?
15:51 - in other words, RUN MORE GAMES :)
18:01 - how would newbies transition from the online hunt to live events?
22:36 - help wanted!
25:11 - plug-o-rama: Spaceteam, Amnesia Fortnight Game Jam, Puzzle Hunt Calendar
28:20 - The End

Tell us we're wrong on the Internet! E-mail podcast@snout.org or post a comment at www.snout.org/podcast.

Music: instrumentals from "Code Monkey" and "Re: Your Brains" by Jonathan Coulton

[ Subscribe to SnoutCast / iTunes link ]

    

Friday Flash Fiction: "Barely Legal"

Yes, this week's story title is a double entendre, BUT NOT IN THAT SENSE YOU PERV.

Read "Barely Legal" at 512 Words or Fewer

This cat would make a great Xmas gift!

Jasper here! If you live in the Portland metro area, we've got the perfect gift for that special human on your list: Lady Grey! She is a spayed female cat—a gray tuxedo Domestic Shorthair (DSH)—approximately five years old, and she would love to join your family!

Lady Grey likes to explore closets, climb furniture, eat wet and dry food, charge around the house, and watch the world out the window! She greets every visitor, and plays with everything from cat toys to postcards!

See for yourself! Lady Grey stars in this safe-for-work video...


http://youtu.be/l_0HK9GYgiY

...and this TOTES ADORBS photo slideshow!


picasaweb.google.com/116737692309729475506/MeetLadyGrey

I know, right? I'll bet you want to come whisk her away to your loving home right now! Well, here's how you can get in touch with our humans to arrange just that (click image to embiggen):



Make one of your fellow humans very happy with a new cat this holiday season! Preferably Lady Grey! SRSLY.

Note: you should not try to stuff Lady Grey into a stocking, or wrap her up in a box, for that matter! I recommend asking the lucky recipient to close his or her eyes, then gently placing Lady Grey into his or her arms. After that, just step back to reveal the surprise and witness the beginning of a beautiful friendship!

(Lady Grey will put herself in a corner just fine, but that's neither here nor there.)

SnoutCast #147: So That Happened in Vegas

On this week's show, we talk to brothers Justin Graham and Charlie Graham about competing in the Great Urban Race (GUR) National Championship this November!

[ Download mp3 - 28 MB ]

00:59 - "fast"
02:06 - big money and other fabulous prizes
05:20 - transportation and other challenges
09:35 - SnoutOut™ to their support crew!
16:55 - location-based activity highlights
21:38 - brotherly cooperation
24:14 - day jobs: JVG Healthcare and Shop It To Me
27:18 - upcoming events: Puzzled Pint (Portland & Seattle, TONIGHT); Mastermind Pub Hunt (Sacramento, TONIGHT); Real Escape Game (San Francisco, December 14-16th); more on Puzzle Hunt Calendar!
29:57 - The End

Tell us we're wrong on the Internet! E-mail podcast@snout.org or post a comment at www.snout.org/podcast.

Music: instrumentals from "Code Monkey" and "I Feel Fantastic" by Jonathan Coulton

[ Subscribe to SnoutCast / iTunes link ]

   

Friday Flash Fiction: "Introducing Kangaroo"

One of these days, I'm actually going to finish a Kangaroo novel that is of publishable quality. In the meantime, I'm going to keep writing these vignettes to fill in backstory. I hope you enjoy some of them.

Read "Introducing Kangaroo" at 512 Words or Fewer

SnoutCast #146: Listener Mail et cetera

In which we review what some of our listeners had to say about previous podcasts!

[ Download mp3 - 26 MB ]

00:59 - "reactive"
01:55 - Re: "Hangry is the Hunter"
10:48 - Re: "Deadline City"
28:11 - The End

Tell us we're wrong on the Internet! E-mail podcast@snout.org or post a comment at www.snout.org/podcast.

Music: instrumentals from "Code Monkey" and "I Feel Fantastic" by Jonathan Coulton

[ Subscribe to SnoutCast / iTunes link ]

 

Friday Flash Fiction: "The Old Switcheroo"

One more excerpt from this year's NaNoWriMo draft!

I officially "won" on the 28th, but I'm going to one final write-in tonight to get a little farther along, and also to see my fellow Vancouver Wrimos one more time. Then I need to plot out the second half of the story and finish writing it... in December maybe?

Read "The Old Switcheroo" at 512 Words or Fewer

you should ADOPT LADY GREY

hello... I'm TYE and as you know... we have had a GUEST CAT staying with us for the past few months... her name is LADY GREY... here is what she looks like...

now as much as fun as it has been having her around... she likes to run and play which is nice... it has put a bit of a damper on the bachelor lifestyle which JASPER and I previously enjoyed... so it would be nice if one of you lovely humans adopted her into your own lovely home...

if you are interested... please contact our humans by sending an "e-mail" to solechen+ladygrey@gmail.com... they would be happy to tell you all about her...

meanwhile... you can see more photos of LADY GREY online... and experience her supreme adoptability for yourself... do not delay... act now... KTHXBAI

SnoutCast #145: Deadline City

Deadlines are good! IN OUR HUMBLE OPINION.

[ Download mp3 - 32 MB ]

00:59 - "time-sensitive"
05:02 - Exhibit A: Star Wars VII in 2015
05:51 - Exhibit B: Skyfall delays during pre-production
07:02 - Exhibit C: The Amazing Spider-Man (so-called)
08:12 - Exhibit D: The Oatmeal
10:21 - Curtis & DeeAnn & deadlines & pain.
15:35 - the upside of deadlines
18:50 - DeeAnn specializes in "recreativity"
23:47 - long-winded Curtis is long-winded
30:58 - the evolution of Puzzled Pint
33:59 - The End

Tell us we're wrong on the Internet! E-mail podcast@snout.org or post a comment at www.snout.org/podcast.

Music: instrumentals from "Code Monkey" and "Chiron Beta Prime" by Jonathan Coulton

[ Subscribe to SnoutCast / iTunes link ]

 

Friday Flash Fiction: "Food for Thought"

More from this month's NaNoWriMo draft.

Eagle-eyed readers will note that the pictured food item is actually Korean, not Japanese.

And one of my favorite quotations of all time*, from the late Lin Yutang: "What is patriotism but the love of the food one ate as a child?"

Read "Food for Thought" at 512 Words or Fewer



* OF ALL TIME!

SnoutCast #144: Hangry is the Hunter

Seriously, dude, hangry is, like, totally a thing.

[ Download mp3 - 21 MB ]

00:58 - "nutritious"
02:06 - IRONICALLY
05:14 - etymology wars
09:06 - why DeeAnn enjoys feeding people
13:30 - actually, variety is the spice in life
16:37 - the trouble with cheese
19:29 - no joke, these bags are super useful
21:52 - The End

Tell us we're wrong on the Internet! E-mail podcast@snout.org or post a comment at www.snout.org/podcast.

Music: instrumentals from "Code Monkey" and "Chiron Beta Prime" by Jonathan Coulton

[ Subscribe to SnoutCast / iTunes link ]

 

Friday Flash Fiction: "Bottoms Up"

More from this month's NaNoWriMo draft.

Also, it's really a toss-up as to whether Wikipedia or Myths RETOLD is more factually accurate overall, but the latter sure is a lot more entertaining to read.

Read "Bottoms Up" at 512 Words or Fewer

SnoutCast #143: The Three P's

Which are, of course: Puzzles, Pints, and Portland!

[ Download mp3 - 24 MB ]

00:59 - "local"
01:45 - e.g., Puzzled Pint
05:00 - just-in-time puzzle creation
09:10 - THE ANECDOTE
11:37 - dafuq?
16:27 - analogy trouble
20:58 - do-it-yourself Puzzled Pint, anyone?
25:35 - The End

Tell us we're wrong on the Internet! E-mail podcast@snout.org or post a comment at www.snout.org/podcast.

Music: instrumentals from "Code Monkey" and "The Future Soon" by Jonathan Coulton

[ Subscribe to SnoutCast / iTunes link ]

 

Friday Flash Fiction: "Able Was I Ere I Saw Elba"

Why a palindrome for today's story title? Because this is my 215th 512 story, which makes the shortlink (below) palindromic as well!

And yes, this is more from my current NaNoWriMo draft. It's kind of a fun challenge to pick out a scene, or part of one, which I can compress into ~500 words.

Read "Able Was I Ere I Saw Elba" at 512 Words or Fewer

Lady Grey Strikes Back!

Jasper here! Earlier this week there was an incident involving our beloved Food Robot and our somewhat disruptive house guest, Lady Grey! Everything is fine now, but I must report on these shenanigans!

It is possible that Lady Grey became aware that Food Robot is only designed to feed two cats, and since Tye and I have seniority in this household, she would always be the third wheel. It is also possible that this disparity came into stark relief when the humans were away for much of last weekend, and thus did not feed us as often.

But we do not deal in speculation! We are interested in facts! AND HERE ARE THE FACTS:

At 7:00 AM on Monday, November 5th, Food Robot delivered our breakfast as usual.



About twenty minutes later, Lady Grey approached Food Robot...



...and instigated a vicious and unprovoked attack! And yes, she is actually chewing on the blue tape which secures the ramp to the housing! Outrageous!




Moments later, summoned by Tye, one of the humans came along to document the crime scene.




And then we all went back to sleep for a while. The humans knew our next auto-feeding would not happen until 6:00 PM, so they had plenty of time to repair the damage.

BUT WAIT! Something else happened less than ninety minutes later, and it was caught on camera!



Really? Was that really necessary, Lady Grey? Really?



Sigh.

Though it took a few more hours, the humans eventually came to the rescue and rebuilt Food Robot! They also took the opportunity to improve the structural design of the ramp, as shown below!




(Those interested can view additional photographic evidence, or a complete video record from that day.)

I am happy to report that things are back to normal now, and Lady Grey has been behaving herself—more or less—since Monday!

So what have we learned? One, that Food Robot is vulnerable to feline interference; but we knew that already. Two, that Lady Grey is an inveterate troublemaker! Between this and chasing Tye and me all around the house, she is definitely ready to leave and go to her own home!



Please adopt Lady Grey! Contact the humans for more information.

SnoutCast #142: One and One and One is Three

If you're reading this in the United States and it's still Election Day and you haven't voted yet, GO VOTE.

[ Download mp3 - 21 MB ]

01:00 - "elective"
02:00 - (for the record: Mordin Solus)
02:55 - upcoming: The Hunt for Black Bart's Hidden Hoard...
04:21 - ...part of Come Out and Play SF 2012
06:46 - once again, GC Summit 2012 videos are online!
09:22 - "official" organizations for puzzle hunts?
11:36 - hooray for diversity
12:27 - hooray for Puzzle Hunt Calendar
14:17 - whence GC Summits?
17:27 - don't forget the National Puzzlers' League
20:10 - and then there's Puzzled Pint
21:13 - The End

Tell us we're wrong on the Internet! E-mail podcast@snout.org or post a comment at www.snout.org/podcast.

Music: instrumentals from "Code Monkey" and "You Ruined Everything" by Jonathan Coulton

[ Subscribe to SnoutCast / iTunes link ]